I read this book in high school. I wasn’t sure when I found it was I was even looking for. I remember thinking this book was odd on the shelf of a high school beyond it being about a teenager. I was even more surprised after I checked it out to find it described drug use in a raw and scary way, but after that I found this book to be truly heartbreaking.
It doesn’t promote drug use by any means. It’s a crushing story about drug use. This is a book I’ve read online described as a 90’s kids version of Go Ask Alice. It’s definitely worth a read.
Synopsis:
I felt the prick of the needle, but only for a second, because this great rush of warmth quickly followed, encompassing my whole body from my toes right up to the top hair on my head. I couldn’t move for a minute as she guided the needle in and out of my vein. When she was done, I felt like I had entered heaven. I looked in the mirror and felt beautiful and confident. I felt this great peace, at last, a warmth, and I knew that everything was going to be okay–and really always had been. Like time had stopped and I was floating on a cloud.
“Writing the book, I saw my old dope dealer and bought $1,500 worth of pure heroin–Brown Gold–and started shooting up ten times a day to get the feel of the book. Well, I did, all right. I ended up in Glen Cove General, almost dead. In truth, you make a deal with the Devil. He takes away your pain, but he owns you. You live for the next fix. After a while, it’s totally physical; your body has to have it. But I’m off it for good.”
— Linda Glovach